By: Alaina Valdespino
We all know that this election has been as chaotic and anxiety provoking as this COVID-stricken year. We understand that there is a lot riding on this election: our values, our beliefs, and the potential of life-altering change. With all of these important issues on the line, it isn’t a surprise that this subject is in fact a sticky one, especially when talking to someone who has differing views from yourself. For that reason, I feel the need to share an important message with you all.
First and foremost, this election is a big one; it affects everyone. Even if you’re not the type of person that likes to discuss your political views, this election isn’t giving you the chance to slide under the radar. America’s political scene is too polarizing and too deeply divided to allow for that. And yes, political discussions can be scary. They cause conflict, they can get argumentative, and they are something that many people choose to avoid all together. But avoidance isn’t the answer to solving this issue and it’s not the answer that’s going to cut it this year. In fact, avoiding these discussions leads to further conflict and doesn’t allow you to learn and understand your views as they relate to other people. This logic of avoidance is extremely ineffective and doesn’t get us anywhere. That’s why we need to understand the proactive stances we can take in order to have political discussions in a way that is beneficial to both parties and gives both people a chance to not just express their views, but to learn from the other person and allow for growth.
When approaching a political discussion, it is important to first understand whether or not the other person in the conversation has views similar to or different from you. Once you understand the stance of that person, it is important that you next decide whether or not the moment is right to have that discussion. If the moment isn’t right, simply extend an invitation to have that conversation another time, that way you don’t bombard this person with a conversation they may not wish to have. Clearly this is easier said than done, but by presenting the subject in a way that gives the other person a chance to decide to or not to talk about politics, it allows for a sense of reassurance that makes the subject a lot lighter and less stressful for all those involved.
That being said, when the time comes and the conversation arises, there are a few common rules to follow in order to avoid this conversation turning into an unproductive and problem invoking debate.
First and foremost, create a sense of trust and assurance. Let the person know that this conversation isn’t going to lead to a “friendship break-up” and that you can have differing views and still be friends. Once that is out in the air, make sure to avoid attacking their beliefs should they not be the same as yours because that is what makes these conversations so polarizing. It isn’t easy to do this, but by allowing the other person to express their views entirely before you express yours allows for both people to get their messages across in a way that feels inviting and productive.
More than anything, just make sure that you do your absolute best to not insult or offend the other party's views. Our political views are deeply rooted in our beliefs and our core values and therefore are directly tied to our emotions.
All in all, everyone has difficulty when it comes to having discussions with people that may not agree or that may not understand where you’re coming from. Everyone understands that politics are polarizing, that they are confusing and can cause a lot of conflict. That’s why, especially this election season, we have to rise above the anxiety and the fear of political discussions because they are going to be inevitable. This election is one for the books and the results of it will go down in history. The president of one of the most unprecedented times in American history is going to be elected and regardless of who wins, their policies will go on to affect everyone. For this reason, I believe that we should all take notice of our own views and do what we can to help educate our neighbors and to do our part in having these difficult conversations in order to understand our own views and learn to understand others as well.